My theory to life

I've reached the utmost miserable point I have ever had in my entire life. There are spurs of happiness here and there and I do hold my optimism for some time, but in the end... I am so depressed. No matter how many laughs are shared throughout the day, I retire to my room at night, and sob for hours on end. Unlike most girls, I cannot sob myself to sleep. It only keeps me awake, pushing me into a night filled with insomnia. Within the past 3 weeks, I have received possibly a total of 30 hours of sleep. The stress of money problems and college applications and the cost of college applications and the fate of my sisters pushes more depression on my shoulders than I can even pretend to hold up anymore.
If you knew me prior to these past couple months, you would view me as a strong individual that would fight everything that was thrown at her and never shed a tear because she knew that something will give and things will get better.
That person broke. She is no longer here. She had been worn down little by little, until there was nothing left to wear down. She's gone. During the process of being warn down, she could at least grab the pieces breaking apart and mush them together to make a sad lump, but the pieces were still together. Now, she can't even do that. Now she is me, A tired, run-down, beat up, careless, nut-case. I blame it on my luck. Everything... and if you don't believe me, I mean fucking everything... goes wrong. Even if it's just the simplest of problems, I will get screwed over. Example 1: My mother beats the shit out of me. I get fined an $800 ticket for "running away" in no shoes, a ripped shirt, and blood pouring down my face. Example 2: I get a new camera to put on my laptop. Laptop breaks. Example 3: Gets laptop fixed, Camera doesn't run with my computer's software and now it's too late to take it back cause it took so goddamn long to fix the computer. Example 4: Everything had to be erased from the computer, complete iTunes playlist is gone. Example 5: Newly fixed computer won't download limewire. Example 6: Laptop breaks again after a month and a half of being fixed. (Same issues.) Those are just 5... that have happened in the past month. The first one happened a few years ago, but it's a great example about how the way my life goes.
My belief, there's born people out there. You are born with your luck. My father and I, born with bad luck. My mother and sisters, born with good luck. We all know those people who come out smelling like a rose even when they work in a manure factory. Those are the people born with luck. And every time luck seems to knock on their front door, it's taken away from us. The unlucky ones. I have some friends, and I am willing to bet... if they were to rob a bank, during their escape, they trip into a guy who is about to kill himself, but stop him. The cops stop my friend, give them an award and the key to the city. Sometime close to this occurrence, while I'm giving the little money I have left to a homeless person and decide not to eat that night, I get mugged and when they realize I don't have any money, they leave me in the streets a crumpled mess. I swear to god, this WILL happen if my friend ever decides to rob a bank. But they won't have to, because they will never be in the situation of need for money. Because they... have their luck.
And when we do get ahead, end up on top for once, it will bite us later. Oh and it bites hard. You're walking down the street and stumble upon a wad of money. You don't see anyone around who it could belong to and it only looks like a couple of dollars. You pick it up and pocket it. You unwad the wad later and it ends up being $200. Wow... it's your lucky day.... today. 2 weeks from now, someone breaks into your house, takes your $500 TV, your $200 Wii, and about $400 in movies. Not only that, your sweet old Grandma of a neighbor tells you how lost she is because she lost part of her rent outside. She dropped exactly $200. Now I may be over exaggerating, but I have had near to this for experience.
While my friend, who has everything handed to them, will stumble upon a wad of $500, win a Wii in some contest they never even entered, have a family member give them a $1000 TV for their birthday, and be paid $400 to be in a movie cause they just got that look.
Don't laugh... because this... is... my... life.
And I am done with it.